JEE Advanced results were out. Kushagra was ecstatic to discover that he secured AIR-2249. His joy knew no bounds. Genially, he disclosed his rank to his dad. ” Dad, it’s 2249 ! ” “Kya? Bus 2249? “, his dad replied in dismal tone. Continuing further, he said, ” Pata hai? Sharmaji ke bete Ki 1511 rank aayi hai ! Tum dono ek hi School Mein padhte the, ek hi coaching me jaate the, to uski rank tumse achi kaise aayi? Aaj tak! Aaj tak tum usse aage nahi jaa paaye. Aisa Kya Sharmaji apne bete ke liye karte hain Jo main tumhare liye nahi karta? Bolo? ” Stumped by his dad’s words, all his solace culminated into fizzle. This wasn’t a reply he was expecting though he had heard such words many a times before!

You would be wondering who is this “Sharma ji ka beta” ? Well I have an answer for you. “Sharma ji ka beta” is the flawless, indefectible and ideal guy. Each and every parent aspires that his son is replica of Sharma ji’s son. “Sharma ji ka beta” is the outcome of that sperm which left millions of its kind behind in Mrs. Sharma’s womb and keeping the trend alive, he is leaving millions begin in the race of becoming a perfect son. All kids secretly curse Sharma ji’s son. He is excellent in academics and extremely obedient to Mr.&Mrs. Sharma.

Sharma ji’s son’s appetite will become your appetite by default because Sharmaji is omniscient. He knows every bloody thing and will choose the ambition of his son which will ultimately become your forced ambition. Sharmaji’s son will always lead you rather, he would always override you. No matter how much you scratch your head, he will always remain superior to you. Sharmaji’s son will have a higher salary, a car, a house, a boat & a unicorn before you do in life.

The indispensible fact is that Indian parents always follow what their near & dear ones are doing irrespective of its congeniality, adaptability and propriety. Indian parents are generally academic oriented and therefore they want their sons to excel in academics. But comparing their son to someone superior in academics mostly causes discouragement rather than intended inspiration. Comparing own kids with others is supposed to be a part of “Tiger parenting” . You force your kids to be better by telling them how much they suck ! Comparison lowers self-esteem and self-worth of kids. The kid starts believing that others are better than him and that he is incapable of performing well or living to the expectations of the parents. The “good for nothing” starts to settle in. This feeling is very damaging for the personal and academic growth of the child .

The basic intention of parents is that they want their children to lead a better life but they could not convey this thought through better words. They want to tell ” Beta 5 baje jaga

karo, kyunki morning me dimaag fresh rehta hai ” , instead they say” 5 baje jaga kar, dekh Sharma ji ka beta kitna hoshiyaar hai aur tum bed pe pada rehta hai ” . They intend to tell ” Beta aur mehnat karke acche marks lana. ” but instead they say ” Sharmaji ke bete se Kuch seekh le, kitne acche number laata hai ! ”

Comparing one child to another is an insidious practice. Each child is unique and beautiful in his/her way. Parents ought to realize this thereby accepting, encouraging, and nurturing each child’s individual talents. When we try to fit children into a certain standard and compare them, we fail to see who they truly are and what they need in order to grow. Every child develops at their own pace and that comparing behavior and growth to other kids the same age is a useless activity. What a parent needs to do is focus on his/her own child’s interests, boost their confidence and show them the way. Concentrate on what makes them happy and let them know how special they are.

As Theodore Roosevelt has pertinently said : Comparison is the thief of joy.

Parents shouldn’t abscond the bliss of childhood from their kid. Every parent should strive to build a confident person out of their kid ! Give them space and they’ll surely reach the sky.